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Two words that kill your relationship with employees

These two words could kill both employee relationship and creativity.
By Jill Schiefelbein |


Telling someone that something is “not possible” is a dangerous action. If you do this to your employees, you might as well toss money in the trash.


Related: 7 things you should never say to your employees

Unfortunately, managers and leaders do it all too often. When you tell someone that something is “not possible” you typically get one of two reactions:



1.The person will be determined to prove you wrong.

2.The person’s spirit will be broken.


Either way the reaction is polarizing, pitting a leader against employees. It becomes me versus you or us versus them. Neither is productive.


If a person sees “not possible” as a challenge and becomes obsessed with proving the statement wrong, you get an employee who is unilaterally focused on a task that you’ve already deemed non-essential. This takes productivity away from other tasks and can also upset the collaborative balance of workplace teams. You also run the risk of the employee looking for a new job—at a place where something IS possible and where management better encourages and supports innovation.


When you use “not possible” you also erode employee morale. In this scenario you get an employee who feels under-valued, under-appreciated, or, worse, under-utilized. By saying something is “not possible” you’re telling someone that his or her thoughts aren’t worth merit, that innovation isn’t encouraged, and that he or she shouldn’t bring new ideas to the table. This produces an environment of rigidity and imbalance.



When people feel undue stress in the workplace, they actively seek to restore equity. This can manifest through a decrease in productivity, increased workplace gossip, exit planning, a breakdown in team dynamics, and many other negative impacts on the bottom line.


Related: 5 strategies to grow effective leaders



So what happens when the words “not possible” slip out? Are you immediately doomed?



No. Not if you add one simple word.


If you’re going to use the words “not possible” or if you catch them slipping out, here is a simple fix.


Add “unless…” to your sentence.


“It’s not possible unless you/I/we can find a way to [reduce the budget by X amount].”


“This just isn’t possible unless you/I/we can [create an additional revenue stream to fund the research].”


This simple addition allows for the employee to envision a cause-and-effect relationship between his/her idea and the larger vision of a business. By doing so, it also challenges the employee to be creative about a way to reduce the budget, create an additional revenue stream, or whatever needs to be done to make an idea possible. Many new ideas can float to the surface from this simple addition. This also allows for an if/then thought process, allowing a free-flow of ideas to come to the surface and enabling your employees to be an active part of a solution.



People support what they help create. Employees who feel invested in their teams and companies are more productive contributors to the organization’s vision. Managers who support co-creation provide employees with a path to exercise innovation and creativity in the face of restraints and challenges.


Don’t use limiting language and be an innovation killer. Instead, let your employees help you rethink what IS possible.


Related: High performers and high-potential employees are not one in the same



Copyright 2015 Entrepreneur Media, Inc. All rights reserved.
This article originally appeared on Minor edits have been done by the editor.

 Photos  from Flickr (Pikkujenna and Roman Temkin)

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